The Importance of You in a Relationship with Essential Oils

When we think of relationships most of us will automatically refer to the one we have with an intimate partner, but actually we are having a relationship with everything all of the time, even with inanimate objects such as a chair, or with our computer. We have a relationship with our environment, with sleep, with work and with food… so of course we can have a relationship with essential oils too. And, in all cases, we are either having a healthy, harmonious relationship or not.

Essential Oils and You is about bringing awareness to the relationship we have with ourselves and how that can be reflected in how we use the oils.

Essential Oils + You = Relationship.

The question is though, what kind of relationship is that?

The quality of your ingredients will play a part in the quality of the outcome, so using quality essential oils is important but what is the quality that ‘you’ bring to the relationship?

Whatever it is that you are having a relationship with, ‘You’ are the common ingredient, and the relationship you have with yourself will have a great impact on the outcome. And so, ‘the way’ you relate to you and the quality of care that you bring to you is really important.

When it comes to using an essential oil, I have had many clients who ask for an oil to ‘fix’ back pain, or an oil to ‘solve’ sleep problems. It is possible to use them in this way, i.e. to match the symptom with an essential oil with properties to address that symptom.
For example, lavender essential oil has pain relieving and calming properties, so it can support back pain and sleep problems. But, what about the affect of ‘you’ in that equation?
What if it is the quality of our intention behind using the oils that matters most? Do we just want relief from a situation so we can continue living in a way that has contributed to those ailments? Or do we want the true healing on offer?

What if your purpose in using the oils was more like this:

I have back pain, there are lots of things going on in my life that I think may be causing it, and some that seem to make it worse, how can I support myself best to change or address these things that are resulting in back pain?

When we ask ourselves these questions, then there is the potential for true healing to be the result, rather than bypassing the issue that caused the symptom and just addressing the outcome. The more honest you can be with yourself, the more you get to discover about yourself and the quality of your relationship with yourself deepens. You then bring a different intention to the way you can use essential oils (support rather than relief) and a different quality to all your relationships.

So the equation has the potential to look something like this:

Essential Oils + You = an unfolding relationship with more honesty, more care, more awareness, more understanding, more nurturing, more love… in relation to everything in life, and hopefully along the way the symptoms will improve or pass as you deal with the root causes.

Your most important relationship is the one you have with your self, because you are the key ingredient in your relationships with everything else in your life, whether it be the way you use essential oils, the way you express with your colleagues at work, or the way you put yourself to sleep each night… You are the most important ingredient in every relationship.

Connection, Rituals and Nurturing – How to use Essential Oils in Daily Life.

Essential oils are a potent tool to support health and well-being, from chronic illness to the common cold. There are an array of oils to choose from, each with powerful properties that help ease many symptoms both in the body and the mind. There are a myriad of ways they can be used too, which can actually be a little overwhelming, but no matter what my symptoms may be, or what essential oil I feel like using, there are three main ways that I incorporate them into my daily life:

Esoteric Healing Eye Pillow
Taking a moment to reconnect with a scented healing eye pillow.

Connection

– to support a consistent connection with my body and to reconnect to myself when I feel out of sorts;

 

 

 

Simply lighting a scented candle when taking a shower makes all the difference to my morning.
Simply lighting a scented candle when taking a shower makes all the difference to my morning.

Rituals

– to use the oils in daily rituals that support me to live with a steady rhythm and stay connected with what’s around me;

 

 

Feeling what part of my body I want apply cream to.

Nurturing

– to use essential oils in a nurturing way that supports developing a deeper relationship with myself.

 

 

 

 

These ways can look quite different for each individual person, so here are some practical examples of how it can play out for me:

Using myrrh essential oil on my wrists.
Using myrrh essential oil on my wrists.

Connection – If I’m feeling a bit stressed, tired or distracted, I may take five minutes to sit and massage my wrists with some hand cream or massage oil blended with myrrh essential oil. This area feels particularly delicate to me and this action allows me to feel how tender my body is, so quite quickly it brings me back to myself which gives me a chance to address what ever is going on that resulted in me feeling out of sorts -hence the re-connection.

 

Appreciating the lavender bags in my wardrobe each morning when I choose what to wear.
Appreciating the lavender bags in my wardrobe each morning when I choose what to wear.

Rituals – In my daily tasks I like to bring a little touch of magic to what I do, I might add a sprinkle of lavender oil into my laundry powder or a few drops of lemon oil onto kitchen surfaces when I’m cleaning. It’s a way of bringing my innate quality to every day life and recognizing each moment as precious.

 

 

Adding a little rose oil to my face cream & cherishing myself as I apply it.
Adding a little rose oil to my face cream & cherishing myself as I apply it.

Nurturing – The more I build the connection with myself and the daily rituals in my life, the more deeply I feel I naturally nurture myself. It seems that if I care enough to commit to the other two, the nurturing builds by itself. It’s like I have more respect and time to care for myself. Rose is my favorite oil to use in this way, at the moment its in my face cream which also gets applied to other areas of my body that need attention, it’s likely to be in a perfume that I make (that I quite often just wear to bed) or a few drops in my shower gel which means my skin gets massaged with rose each morning –very delicious.

These are all simple ways that I use the oils and they don’t take too much time up. Everyone could use essential oils in their day to day life, perhaps in different practical ways depending on what they like and the practicalities of their day. But by bringing the focus to connection, rituals and nurturing, it tends to avoid the oils becoming just another quick fix for ailments and supports addressing the route cause of the issue. It also allows me to appreciate the real beauty and power in the oils, but also how important my part is in supporting my health and wellbeing.

If you would like to discuss how essential oils can support you or request a Bespoke Blend you can email me directly at laura@essenstialoilsandyou.co.uk.

For more inspiration on how to use essential oils read Nurture, Cherish, Adore – inspired by Natalie Benhayon.

Click here for more tips on developing Self Care Rituals.

To Nurture, Cherish and Adore – inspired by Natalie Benhayon

Do you nurture yourself every day? Have you ever cherished yourself?

Could you even allow yourself to adore you?

When I first heard Natalie Benhayon say these words a few years ago at a presentation, I couldn’t even say that I had a real understanding of how to nurture myself, let alone cherish (and adore was not even on my radar), they were literally just lovely words to hear.

Natalie Benhayon
Natalie Benhayon

Since then, Natalie has inspired me to discover very deeply what these words: ‘nurture’, ‘cherish’ and ‘adore’ mean, how they feel in my body and this has ultimately allowed me to begin an intimate relationship with myself, as a person and especially as a woman.

Over the years I have had support from Natalie in many forms, including her presentations at Universal Medicine Retreats, True Movement classes, Esoteric Ovary massages & other Esoteric Womens Health projects, including Women in Livingness Groups, the Women in Livingness Magazine and her ultimate app –Our Cycles. These are just a few examples of the work she has presented and put together -at just 26 years old she is an incredibly inspiring woman who is asking all the right questions about what is going on in world, about the state of women’s health, our relationships and so much more and what’s more, she’s actually making changes.

Natalie Benhayon presenting
Natalie Benhayon presenting

One thing that really struck me early on when I met her was her confidence, she is completely at ease with herself, so steady and committed, and with it very humble. It’s obvious that she does her own thing and does not let others hold her back, she certainly doesn’t hold back her beauty, sense of humour or sexiness. But what I observe and continue to appreciate, is that everything in her life, the way she lives, what she continually discovers and develops is openly shared with everyone, so that all have an equal opportunity to find that confidence in them selves and show it with that same ease in their own way.

Today when I consider the words nurture, cherish and adore, I have a tangible relationship with all three that is continuing to develop and deepen.

To NURTURE for me means to look after myself in all aspects of my life, to ask myself questions about what I actually would love to do right now, to make space to be playful with my daily chores, to not choose to do things that will overwhelm my day, to decide I’m worth taking an extra moment for -whether to light a candle before I take a shower each morning or to breath in the scent of a flower as I pass by. It means not giving myself a hard time when I inevitably make mistakes, noticing the self bashing commentary in my mind and letting it go, moving in a way that doesn’t push or strain my body. Basically, it’s making choices to truly support myself and my body throughout my day to day life.

One of the difficulties I see is that we’ve created a life that doesn’t allow the space for nurturing and we don’t regard ourselves enough to make that space for ourselves. Using essential oils has been a way that I have been able to experiment with nurturing and making that space, but it’s not about the physical act of putting some massage oil on my skin or sprinkling essential oils in a burner, I see them as moments that I can use to learn more about myself. Much of what I have been discovering is shared on these blogs with the purpose of inspiring others to experiment with what nurturing is for them and helping to develop a connection with their body -one of my favourite blogs on this is ‘Myrrh Essential Oil – Supporting Connection with myself‘ -it’s a good example of how it’s not about the oil but about you and the way you use the oil.

rose and neroli face cream

To CHERISH is to really appreciate myself, to know and value my natural qualities and strengths, and know with out doubt that they are worth sharing with others and can support and inspire them too.  It’s also to cherish my weaknesses and flaws, to embrace them, to allow time to focus on them to support myself and allow the support and inspiration from others. It’s knowing that all parts are just as precious, from running a perfume workshop to flossing my teeth.

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To ADORE is to fall in love with myself. This is absolutely not an arrogance, the more I get to know myself, to ask myself what I’d love to do right now, the more I can feel a loving way of being with myself -I’m letting go of the auto pilot and constant rushing. Some times I take a second to look into my eyes in the mirror, and connect to all those things I cherish and know there is so much more to come… as I work on the others I feel this one more, sometimes it’s as simple as climbing into bed and feeling my feet under the bed sheets.

Natalie Benhayon eyes
Natalie Benhayon

I actually feel that we all innately know how to nurture, cherish and adore; we just need a reminder of how awesome it feels and that we are so worth it.

So, huge thanks and appreciation to Natalie Benhayon for reminding me to truly value and actually love myself, to feel confident in showing myself with the world and know that I have something precious to share.

Natalie Benhayon talks about 'True Sexy'.
Natalie Benhayon talks about ‘True Sexy’.

Listen to Natalie Benhayon interviewed on this audio: Are you deeply nurturing yourself?

Watch Natalie Benhayon speak on True Sexy:

Images of Natalie Benhayon courtesy of UnimedLiving

How to Take Care of your Clothes with Essential Oils.

A change of season means a change of wardrobe, what ever side of the planet you’re on you are bound to be experiencing the change in seasons, whether it’s time to pack away your warm jumpers and winter coats or say goodbye to summer dresses and cool T-shirts, essential oils are a sweet smelling and practical way to look after your clothes.

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If you’ve ever experienced an attack of moths on your favourite cashmere jumper then you will be sure to take extra care when you store your knitwear and silks away for several months. Here are a few tips to help protect your clothes and ensure they reappear in one piece, smelling fresh when you unpack next Spring/Autumn…

It’s advisable to give everything a wash before you pack them up and as a side note, if you haven’t worn them all season, consider getting rid of them, there are so many benefits to de-cluttering your wardrobe! I add a few drops of lavender essential oil to my washing powder for a little touch of freshness and since lavender oil deters moths it is a great smelling start to the process.

I then take several lavender filled bags or pillows that contain dried lavender flowers, if the scent has faded I add a few drops of lavender oil to freshen them up. I also sprinkle a few drops of cedar wood essential oil as this is another oil that deters moths, (cedar wood oil is dark brown in colour, so you may want to avoid staining the material on the lavender bags, in that case just add a few drops to tissues). Tuck the lavender bags evenly among the clothes in their suitcase or storage bag and close securely.

I don’t think anyone likes the smell of mothballs and even if you’ve never had moths this is still a worthwhile ritual as it keeps your clothes fresh and smelling lovely when you bring them out next season…

If you don’t have any lavender bags you can sprinkle the oils onto tissues and place them in the storage bags. Alternatively, you can purchase some from BySally or Mayfield Lavender.

 

These ones are way too pretty for me to pack away so I generally keep them in my draws, with my bed linen or on hangers in my wardrobe so I can appreciate them daily.

Since lavender has so many other amazing properties including supporting a restful night sleep, I also hang a lavender bag on my bedpost, or under my pillow so that I breathe in the scent as I lay down to sleep.

Click here to read more on how to use lavender oil to support sleep and how to scent your car naturally.

Lav bags group 1 small

For tips on de-cluttering your life check out ‘Simplicity in Living‘.

Healing Eye Pillows by Feather Light Productions

Feather Light Healing Eye Pillow Red FlowersFeather Light Healing Eye Pillow Pink Blossom

These beautiful silk healing eye pillows, scented with quality essential oils, are now available to buy from Essential Oils & You’s new Shop – this blog will share a little of how they can be used…

I’m choosing to sell these because they are truly exquisite, deeply supportive and made with such love and care, you can really sense the integrity that has gone into making them.

There are two designs to choose from: red flowers or pink blossom, the silk cover is removable, so you can hand wash it if need be, with soft black silk on the underside that feels gorgeous on your skin.

Inside the silk cover is an inner bag containing flax seeds which feel light across your eyes, yet mould around the contours of your face so it sits snug and blocks any light out as you rest. This makes it useful for headaches, migraines and for helping to get to sleep if you’re disturbed by light.

In cooler seasons I recommend warming the eye pillow on top of a radiator or ideally in a towel warmer if you have such a thing.  It is very supportive for restlessness, sleeplessness, anxiety and stress. For symptoms such as aching joints, period pains and back ache you can place the eye pillow on the appropriate body parts.

I like to place one over my eyes each night as I go to sleep, or if I feel stress, tension or tired, I lay with one across my eyes and one on my heart for 5-10 minutes to refresh myself.

Esoteric Healing Eye Pillow

These pillows are also a great accessory for therapists to use in various modalities such as massage.

Click here for details on how to purchase them from the website shop or contact me directly by email: laura@essentialoilsandyou.co.uk

How to use Essential Oils from Trees to Support our Respiratory System and in Skin Care.

One of the many things I love about essential oils is how the effect on our body is connected to the plant itself and that plants action in life. Trees produce oxygen by their mode of respiration which supports us with our respiration, so, it seems natural for the essential oil to support conditions that affect our respiratory system, like colds and coughs. When you breath in essential oils you can feel it in your body immediately, and this is particularly prominent with tree oils such as eucalyptus and pine. You can feel them cleaning and clearing as they pass from the tip of your nose deep down into your lungs. I feel my chest expand, even my posture changes and I will naturally be more open and stand taller – just like a tree.

Eucalyptus trees.

Everything is connected so it goes beyond the respiratory system, but it’s a good example of feeling for yourself in your body, how the oils can support.

Frankincense & myrrh have a less fierce action on the respiratory system, much more calming, helping to bring a gentleness back to your breath. They are a great support for conditions such as asthma, panic attacks, stress, anxiety and for use in meditation.

Click here for links to free gentle breath meditation audios, they are quick, simple and a very practical support for real life.

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Image care of Unimed Living

Frankincense is a great oil to scent the room with when you’re taking a moment to breath gently. Myrrh has a much subtler smell so doesn’t work that well in a burner, I prefer to massage this into my wrists to support connection with myself. Click here to read my blog on using myrrh in this way.

Frankincense and myrrh are also examples of how essential oils can act on our bodies in the same way they do so as a tree in life. The essential oil comes from the resin that is produced by the tree when the bark is cut or injured. The resin is a sticky, thick, goo that covers the affected area and then hardens to seal and protect the damaged site, it’s a bit like the way humans form a scab to protect their bodies when the skin is broken.

Frankincense resin.

Can you see why frankincense and myrrh are used in skin care? The resin is healing the tree and the oil that is produced from the resin is used for it’s healing properties on our skin. Frankincense is one of the most popular ingredients in many skin care products. Myrrh is particularly affective in helping festering and difficult to heal wounds, especially in the mouth -it’s useful for mouth ulcers and popular in oral care for this reason (see my blog on gargling with myrrh for more details).  I also like to use myrrh on dry, hard, cracked skin, it’s the base of my blend for scars and usually appears in the skin care products I make -it has recently been working wonders for a client with bed sores.

Benzoin is similar to frankincense and myrrh, it is a tree that produces a resin that is made into an essential oil. It is very protective to the skin but has a very pleasing vanilla like scent that makes it particularly comforting to use for stress and anxiousness as well as in skin care.

I find that even the character of trees confirms how they work on the body. Large, tall strong trees like pines and firs and huge eucalyptus trees with tonnes of leaves are very expansive to the respiratory system, powerfully cleansing and clearing. Whereas the more delicate small trees like frankincense and myrrh work in a more gentle way, supporting reconnecting when you feel out of sorts. Both are very powerful but different in action, a reflection of ourselves as humans; we all have different strengths and qualities that offer support in different ways.

Boswellia carteri tree
Boswellia carteri – the tree that produces frankincense essential oil from its resin.

You could not compare the delicacy of a flower that may last a few days or weeks to the strength of a huge oak that could live for generations. One is not better than another, for each brings a natural beauty that is needed. In this same way, we can appreciate each other for our natural qualities, we all have something to bring to this world of value and it is a true gift for humanity when we share ourselves in full.

Raw Fruit and Nut Balls – flavoured with Essential Oils

Fruit & Nut Balls (AKA Mini Christmas Puddings) – Recipe

These delicious fruit & nut balls are super simple to make with the added benefit of being raw (no cooking needed), gluten free, dairy free & sugar free! (the dried fruit makes them sweet enough).

Ingredients:

  • 80g – golden sultanas
  • 50g – dates
  • 60g – dried cranberries (without added sugar)
  • 50g – dried apricots (brown ones if you can as the orange ones have preservatives in)
  • 130g – ground almonds
  • 50g – walnuts (or another favourite nut)
  • 8 drops – Orange Essential Oil (must be food grade) or an essential oil of your choice*
  • 1 table spoon –Olive Oil
  • A dash of Cinnamon, Clove, All Spice and Nutmeg (powder)
  • 1 table spoon Ground flax seeds (optional)
  • A sprinkle of finely ground desiccated coconut to decorate.

You could use any essential oil* you like to flavour these, some other suggestions that work well include peppermint, mandarin or geranium. You could also try a combination e.g. orange & geranium, lime & peppermint but keep the total number of drops as 8.

Instructions

  1. Place all of the fruit & nut ingredients into a food processor.
  2. Add 8 drops of the orange essential oil to a table spoon of olive oil. This helps even distribution of the essential oil.
  3. Add the oil to the other ingredients in the processor and blend until the mixture comes together. If the mix is too dry and not sticking together, add another dash of olive oil.
  4. Shape in to balls by rolling in the palms of your hands and place into mini cake cases. I weight out about 30g of mix to get even sized balls.
  5. Finish off by using a sieve to sprinkle finely ground desiccated coconut over the tops or roll in sesame seeds.

*Essential oils must be 100% pure, organic and unadulterated to be suitable for use in flavouring foods – Essential Oils & You are suitable. Never ingest essential oils before diluting them.

With thanks to Heather Di Marino from ‘Eat Well Live Well’ for sharing her wonderful recipe, her Raw Orange & Carrot Carob Brownies are another delicious treat you can flavour with essential oils.